5 Benefits of Having a Long-term Lover


Being in the right relationship offers a whole lot of possibilities for both individual growth and growth as a couple. It also offers the comfort of knowing each other like two peas in a pod, and there’s no longer moments where you’re uncertain about what the other has to offer. As someone’s who’s lucky enough to be in such a relationship, I’ve listed down a few insights on why having a long-term lover has quite a few benefits.

1. When you sleep together, you can actually sleep.

Though it’s always such a fun time between the sheets, there are other moments when you just want to cuddle and relax peacefully beside them. I’ve found that when you’re new in a relationship, you tend to want physical activities more and leave rest for when you’re really incredibly super tired.

Being with a partner for a long time means you don’t have to always give in to what they want, and the other person understands and respects that. From the relationships some of my friends have had, most have found it difficult to say no to sexual encounters, simply because they’re a new couple and are still trying to understand how the other responds to different things. This brings me to point number two.

2. There are no ‘between-the-sheets’ surprises.

Surprises can be good or bad, but when it comes to bedroom activity, keeping those to a minimum when you’re a new couple is usually the way to go. With long-term partners, there’s really no need to fear what they’ll do to you under the sheets.

Sure, they could mix things up once in a while, but since they know what you like and how you like it, your partner won’t introduce a new activity they know you wouldn’t like. If you’ve been a couple for a while, nothing really can surprise you negatively anymore. You won’t have to ask the “you want me to do what?!” question at them anymore too, and suffer awkwardness after.

3. You can share your fantasies with them - and maybe act out a few as well.

When you have a long-term lover, nothing is taboo anymore, and I mean it. Everything you want and have ever dreamed of doing within the four corners of your bedroom (or anywhere really) is no longer a shock to your partner. If you’re both open about each other’s needs, the other will understand your motivation for wanting certain things.

If you’re both game, chances are, you’ll both be willing to act out a few of your fantasies and help your relationship become more intimate, not just physically but emotionally as well. Most of us don’t like bringing up our deepest desires as it makes us fragile and prone to abuse, but with the right, long-term partner, this is no longer a fear.

4. When you’re in the mood for some action, you know how to get it from them.

As you’ve been together for *so* long, the guessing game of ‘how can I make him touch me’ or ‘is he in the mood right now’ is a thing of the past. There’s no need to overthink “strategies” or fool around just so you can figure out how to get him under the sheets. Whether you’re in the mood for calm loving or destroy-the-house sex, a long-time partner will be able to read that. Sometimes, only a stare or an ‘accidental’ undie-slip is needed to get the party started.

5. You don’t think they love you - you KNOW it.

The best feeling in the world is knowing that the people you love love you back. The second-best feeling is being certain that they *do* adore and love you as much as you think they do.

Being part of a long-term relationship has made me realize that love really does stand the test of time. In the early stages, it’s common to feel lost and unsure of things, because you’ve both come from different situations. You’re trying to build a relationship together and complement each other because of love. n’t easy, and maintaining one isn’t a walk in the park either. It takes not only love, but patience, understanding, respect, and trust to keep the relationship afloat.